But it turns out….it was reality.
It’s been an intense week. Highs and lows, joy and heartbreak.
It seems like I’m either totally shut down (wintertime shut down mode) or totally moving 100mph down this crazy train track that is my creative life.
Last week, I submitted the mystery book for print publication. Yesterday, I held that book in my hand. Can you imagine the joy? How long has this book been waiting in the wings to see the light of day? How many publishers and agents have turned it down? This project has been years in the making.
So, to see that book and to hold it in my hands is a great joy in my life.
In the midst of joy, there is heartbreak. One of my dear friends died this past Saturday. I’m so sad that he’s gone, but my life is so much richer for him having been in it. The funeral was yesterday, Valentine’s Day, and it seems like in the past few years, I’ve lost so many people who are dear to my life.
But still, we move forward and keep moving on. Creativity is the be-all and end-all of my life. I may not be actually doing anything at every moment of my life, but my brain is always going.
Today I woke up at 2am. Insomnia is always a problem for me.
At 8am, I had the car loaded, and I headed out on damp roads and foggy skies to Oklahoma City for an appointment at the recording studio.
This is my second session at this new studio, and the engineer and I just clicked. You know how it is when you find a kindred spirit? This was like that. It takes a little while to find your groove, to find a way to communicate, to make it work. But the learning curve in this studio was nonexistent. It clicked immediately. We made good music.
We made good music.
I was BORN to do this with my life.
What words can describe what it is to create something so intangible as a piece of music? Mere words cannot describe what it is to have a piece of my soul captured onto recorded media for all time. Music is about letting out what you feel inside.
For regular readers of this blog, you know how many times I’ve complained of the difficulties of audio engineering. It’s not anything I’ve been able to accomplish on my own. But I’ve got to figure out how to do this myself. I can perform. I can sing and play and write and play the instruments. I can arrange and hire musicians (although today was solo work) and produce. So, to not be able to engineer a session myself has been a major hole in the process.
Finding this new studio, and finding someone who cares about music as I do, and who is willing to work with me ?!?!?!? (not always as easy task)….that is a great joy.
I’ve waited soooo long to be able to send music out into the world. Now…maybe now…that time is nigh.
I bid you happiness and fond wishes that all your dreams become reality.